The first time Marcel Hutchins sat down to meditate, she went through a guided session and tried to relax her shoulders and close her eyes. She lasted two minutes.
“I had a deadline and I thought, ‘I don’t know if I can sit still for this long,'” said Hutchins, who worked as a radio journalist.
At the urging of her father, a long-time practitioner, she tried again and managed to complete a 10-minute video on her third try. “I remember feeling this sense of joy and relaxation,” she said. “I used to be someone who said, “I can’t meditate.”
Hutchins has since become a certified meditation teacher, setting an example for the busy and restless to try it once and try it again. Research shows that a daily meditation practice can reduce anxiety, improve overall health, increase social connection, and more.
The trick is to get over the first wall. Experts say that’s more achievable if you throw common misconceptions out the window. For example, many people only try meditation once because they feel like they’re doing it wrong or that they can’t turn off their brain.
That’s not the point, says Tara Black, who has a Ph.D. in psychology and has trained more than 7,000 people as meditation teachers.
“It’s not about stopping thinking. Just like the body produces enzymes, the mind produces thoughts,” she said. “It’s about growing beyond thought and being able to witness it.”
Start simple
There is no right way to meditate. The important thing is to relax and focus on the present moment. Feel your own breath passing through your nostrils, listen to guided recordings, mentally scan your body from head to toe, repeat loving phrases to yourself, and countless others. Try this technique.
You can sit on the floor, on a chair, or on a cushion. If you are not comfortable, lie down. You don’t even have to close your eyes, but we encourage you to try it. First, there is no standard time, but set goals that are achievable.
“You can customize it to suit you,” says Black, author of several books, including: Radical acceptance: accepting your life with the heart of Buddha
“Even if you don’t want to quit, start with the things you can do easily,” she said.
When you can’t sit still
When you inevitably get distracted, notice the thought or urge to move, acknowledge it, and bring your attention back to where you are.
Instead of judging yourself, be a little curious about the nature of your restlessness, Black said. Ask yourself, “What does it really feel like to want to jump out of my skin?”
Then take a long, deep breath and sit for another minute. If you still want to move, then move. But Brach recommended doing so with caution. Stand up, stretch briefly, take a deep breath, and sit back down. You’d be surprised how her restlessness changes over time, she said. “It will evolve.”
If your restlessness worsens to an uncomfortable level, consider taking a slow, meditative walk. Stay alert but calm and focus on the sounds, sights, and smells around you, or the sensation of the wind or sun on your face.
Please try again tomorrow and the day after.
After you get through your first session, no matter the length, you’ll almost certainly feel better. But research shows that, like exercise, you need to practice consistently for maximum benefit.
It can be daunting for those who are struggling to get started, but Brach suggested trying a few techniques to find what works for you.
“It takes a little experimentation to find a style of meditation that works for your body, mind, and personality,” she said.
