Loneliness feels different for different people. When I think of loneliness, I recall a sad song that plays when the sky is gray and I lean my forehead against a glass window, wondering when the sun will return. A recent poll found that about one in three Americans feel lonely at least once a week, and one in ten feel lonely every day. In this constantly connected world, technology has a huge impact on how we feel lonely. July is Social Wellness Month, a time to check in on relationships and strengthen social connections. Finding support in your community is essential to living a healthy and happy life.
One of the most significant disruptions that has increased loneliness is the pandemic, which has led to widespread remote work, rising costs of living, and, for some, forced relocation. As a relocator from Orlando, I struggled to find ways to make friends in an unfamiliar place. Going from daily chats and lunches with coworkers in the break room to communicating primarily through video chats and emails has diminished the social engagements at work that were once prominent. Today, many people feel isolated because of the lack of built-in opportunities to engage with others. Instead, we see our friends, family, and social media influencers living their lives through our screens. But taking the time to nurture the relationships I made in my new city has helped me rediscover the value of a new beginning.
Social media gives us access to the world like never before. Some people find it hard to remember a time before the advent of a wide variety of social platforms. Increased social media use creates a kind of comparison never seen before. Social media is a curation of everyone’s best moments, but this can make us feel like our experiences aren’t as great as others, leading to feelings of dissatisfaction when spending time with others. The “I want more” or “it’s not enough” effect is hard to mitigate when content is designed to appeal to the masses.
Breaking the cycle of loneliness takes time and effort, but it’s well worth it. Central Florida is fortunate to have a plethora of parks, nature trails, and preserves that offer ecological tours. Plus, getting out into nature has the added benefit of naturally lifting your mood. Take a daring airboat ride or step outside on your lunch break to visit a local cafe. Orlando also has plenty of live entertainment options. Invite friends to a local comedy show or a live music event in one of the entertainment districts. Host a theme party when you need an escape from the heat and turn binge-watching your favorite shows into an event you can enjoy with family and friends. Another activity that can help ease loneliness is finding a cause you believe in and supporting it with like-minded community members.
As a mother of a child with special needs, I know that it can take a lot of unconventional thinking, which means it’s even more important to find a community that can guide you in finding support and services. I’ve taken great comfort and support from knowing that places like play gyms, schools, and the UCF Center for Autism and Related Disabilities exist to help build community. Whether it’s volunteering at a local nonprofit or getting involved in other ways to help your community, nothing brings people together more than working together for a cause. But if you’re stuck in a never-ending cycle of loneliness, therapy can be a great help in breaking out.
Loneliness is experienced in many different ways, but feeling too isolated can be a worry for anyone. Taking the time to check in with your social well-being can go a long way to combating the loneliness that technology and the pandemic have brought about. We may feel separated from others by our differences, but at our core, we are all human beings, wandering the world and seeking connection.
Cindy Castro is a licensed clinical social worker at Thriveworks in Orlando who specializes in relationships, coping skills, and anxiety.
