The first time Marcelle Hutchins sat down to meditate, she took part in a guided session that encouraged her to relax her shoulders and close her eyes. She continued for two minutes.
“I had a deadline and I thought, ‘I don’t know if I can sit still for this long,'” said Hutchins, who used to work as a radio journalist.
At the urging of her father, a longtime meditator, she tried again, completing the 10-minute video on her third try. “I remember feeling joy and relaxation,” she says. “I was someone who used to say, ‘I can’t meditate.'”
Hutchins has since become a certified meditation instructor, setting an example for busy, restless people to try it once and then try again: Research shows that a daily meditation practice can have a multitude of benefits, including reduced anxiety, improved overall health, and increased social connections.
The trick is getting over the initial barrier, and experts say it’s more achievable if you set aside common misconceptions: For example, many people only try meditation once because they feel they’re doing it wrong or that they can’t turn off their brain.
Tara Brach, who has a PhD in psychology and has trained more than 7,000 people as meditation teachers, says that doesn’t matter.
“It’s not about stopping thoughts. Just like your body produces enzymes, your mind produces thoughts,” she says. “It’s about being able to go beyond your thoughts and witness them.”
Start simple
Bratsch emphasized that there is no right way to meditate.
The key is to relax and focus on something in the present moment: feel your breath passing through your nostrils, listen to a guided recording, mentally scan your body from head to toe, repeat love phrases to yourself, or try any of the countless other techniques.
You can sit on the floor, in a chair, or on a cushion. If you can’t sit comfortably, lie down. You don’t have to close your eyes, but it’s a good idea to try.
There is no standard time to start, but set achievable goals.
“You can customize it for yourself,” said Brach, author of several books including “Radical Acceptance: Embracing Your Life With the Heart of a Buddha.”
“Even if you don’t want to quit, start with the maximum you can comfortably do,” she said.
That might mean starting with just a few minutes, says John Mitchell, an associate professor of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Duke University, who uses meditation to treat people with ADHD. The goal should be to make meditation a habit, focusing on the quality of your practice rather than the quantity.
“So the question is, what do you do to create success so you can get momentum and get started right away without feeling like you’re failing?” he said.
Sitting still
It’s inevitable that you’ll get distracted – we all do it. Notice the thought or urge to move, acknowledge it, and bring your attention back to where you were.
Instead of beating yourself up, Bratsch suggests getting a little curious about the nature of your restlessness: Ask yourself, “What would it really feel like to jump?”
Then take a long, deep breath and sit for another minute. If you still feel like moving, move, but Brach recommends moving intentionally: stand up, stretch, take a deep breath, and sit back down. You’ll be amazed at how your sense of restlessness changes over time, she says. “It evolves.”
If your restlessness begins to build to an uncomfortable level, Mitchell suggests trying a slow, meditative walk: stay alert, calm, and focus on the sounds, sights, and smells around you, or the feeling of the wind or sun on your face.
Please try again
If you make it through your first session, regardless of length, you’ll almost certainly feel a sense of calm. But like exercise, research shows that to get the most out of it, it needs to be practiced consistently.
That can seem daunting for those struggling to get started, but Brach suggested trying out a few techniques to find what works for you.
“Finding the style of meditation that works for your body, mind, and personality takes a bit of experimentation,” she says.
Luckily, there are plenty of free meditation resources available online.
“No one reading this needs to go buy anything,” she said.
