I met Kelly Homan Rodsky about 30 years ago when I took a job at Catholic Sun in Syracuse. I started as a regional writer and she was my editor and a lovely person. Kelly had a light touch as editor, but I was happy because it was her first “real” writing job for me. If someone had changed it as much as a semicolon, I probably would have rolled my eyes and cried at the time — I didn’t know how to use a semicolon properly, by the way.
She left the newspaper to attend the School of Communication at Syracuse University, where she worked for about 25 years. But I still kept in touch with her and I was with her when she met her husband, Dennis. (He was smart enough to send her flowers at her workplace right away.) When they got married, “Mony Mony” was on the reception playlist simply because it’s my favorite dance song. I did. I’m always grateful for that. I was excited for them when they adopted their daughter Maddie, who is now in college.
Almost two years ago, Kelly was diagnosed with stage 4 metastatic breast cancer. In other words, the breast cancer that was first discovered in 2018 had an unexpected recurrence. She is currently battling cancer that has spread to her liver and bones. Kelly immediately underwent five months of chemotherapy, and she continues to take oral medication to fight the cancer. She has a new scan every three to six months, and she told me by phone the other day that her last scan had barely detected any cancer in her liver. However, she just gave birth again last Thursday and by the time you read this she will know her results.
I’d like to talk to you about Kelly. Because she’s so amazing. If you ever need anything, really anything, this woman has your back. She even stayed with all three of her children while I was out of town for about 4 days for her work. I’m an editor now. They were around 11 to 5 years old at the time. There are no easy feats. When she came back, she found out they had been to McDonald’s a lot and she took great care of them. They still talk about how much fun it was. A few years ago, when I had my 60th birthday party at Aquinnah City Hall, she came from Syracuse to be there and drove a few other people along. She and her husband regularly pick up and drop off rescue dogs in their spare time. We also accept international students who come to study at SU.
I wondered what Kelly’s spiritual life was like right now, in the midst of this terrible cancer challenge she’s facing, and if I asked her she would tell me. I thought it would be helpful. We talked for over an hour the other day. Our conversations sometimes got heavy, but we also had a lot of laughs about the past and the crazy things that went along with our jobs back then. Unlike me, Kelly continued to faithfully attend Mass for many years and taught her daughter Maddie the sacraments, including her Baptism, First Communion, and her Confirmation.
“I’m going to Mass,” she told me. “I missed a few shows because I had a stomach bug, and then I went again yesterday, and I’ll tell you what, I walked in and thought, ‘Oh my God, I missed it so much.’ There was a baptism during Mass and it reminded me of Maddie’s baptism 18 years ago.” Kelly said Maddie, like many teenagers, had given her approval under duress. . “I knew once she got to college, it would be a challenge, but I told her that when the going gets tough, she has a foundation to fall back on… In good times and bad, I give her that foundation.” I wanted you to wear this.”
Kelly said her faith has kept her “anchored” throughout this cancer process. “It’s not easy,” she admitted. “People say, ‘You’re so strong…’ but what you don’t understand is that I’m one step away from losing. My faith keeps me going. It’s me. really helped me not to lose my mind. I won’t hear about this scan until Wednesday, but I can focus on other things and trust that God will take care of me. Thanks. It helped me stay focused. I’ve never had to deal with problems like this before.”
We talked a little more and Kelly said that she uses the Hallow app to pray before she goes to bed at night. I like that app too. In fact, she says her prayers every morning before taking her medicine. Kelly said that as she strives to stay focused, she keeps in mind that God will help her no matter what happens. “God doesn’t give us anything we can’t handle. I truly believe that – even though sometimes I think, ‘You’re really testing me…can you please stop?’ Except,” she laughed.
“Scans are very difficult… Everything is good right now, but there will come a time when it won’t work. It’s hard to know,” Kelly admitted. “I’d like to think that when something finally happens, it’s God’s plan for me and God will take care of the people I leave behind. I believe wholeheartedly in the plan of the world, and I believe that when we leave this world, we will be fulfilled. Do I want to be that way at age 54? No.”
As Mark Wahlberg says in an ad for the Hallow app, she’s staying “in her prayers.” And her name is on every prayer list we can think of. I know she is in my prayers and in my thoughts every day. Her oncologist said he also prayed for her at church. When you have someone like that in your life, you need all the prayers we can muster. For them, and as Kelly says, for those they may have to leave behind. But for now, we will stay in touch, knowing that we have a common history that we can always laugh about, and that we have common beliefs. And it is a very real hope that God will not give us more than we can handle.
