It feels better than jumping into a cold lake on a sweltering day, or biting into a juicy cheeseburger when you’re hungry, or even getting your wallet back after losing it while traveling abroad. It’s the only thing. Orgasms are so good. That’s why I want to prevent things like this from happening more often. According to some major studies, only 25 percent of women consistently climax during sex with their partner. The rest of us are either hit or miss depending on the night, or never experience female orgasm during intercourse. Compared to the male version (more than 90 percent of men’s girlfriends eat cookies 100 percent of the time), it’s a woman’s “O.” is a temporary phenomenon. The question is, why? What was Mother Nature thinking?
Check out 14 surprising facts about orgasms in this animated video.
That’s what evolutionary biologists have been trying to figure out, with little success. The case of female orgasm: Bias in evolutionary science This paper by Dr. Elizabeth Lloyd, a professor of biology at Indiana University, pokes holes in nearly every previous theory that attempted to pinpoint the evolutionary purpose for female climax. “The clitoris has the essential function of promoting sexual arousal, leading to sexual intercourse and pregnancy in women,” Lloyd says. “However, the actual incidence of the orgasm reflex has never been linked to reproductive success.” Translation: Because women can and do become pregnant without climaxing, Scientists have no idea why we have orgasms.
The good news is that most scientists agree on how to do it. Here’s what they know so far and how that knowledge can help average girls peak more often. Because even if female orgasms turn out to be meaningless in terms of the survival of the species, they still feel pretty damn good.
While you are having a blissful time…
You probably wouldn’t notice if your dog, cat, or cockatiel started rearranging the furniture during orgasm, so it’s impossible to keep track of all the subtle changes going on inside your body. Luckily, renowned sex researchers William H. Masters and Virginia E. Johnson did just that for us in their seminal book, Human Sexuality. Here’s what they found:
The warm, sexy arousal you feel during foreplay is the result of blood going directly to your vagina and clitoris. Around this time, the vaginal walls begin to secrete beads of lubricant, which eventually grow larger and flow together.
As arousal increases, blood continues to flood into the pelvic area, breathing becomes faster, heart rate increases, nipples become erect, the lower part of the vagina narrows to grasp the penis, and the upper part of the vagina tightens to hold the penis somewhere. Expand to put. Take out. If all goes well (i.e. the phone doesn’t ring and your partner knows what they’re doing), you’ll experience an incredible amount of nerve and muscle tension in your genitals, pelvis, buttocks, and thighs. builds up and your body unconsciously releases all the tension. A series of intense waves of pleasure, or orgasm, occur simultaneously.
The big bang is the moment when the uterus, vagina, and anus contract at the same time every 0.8 seconds. A small orgasm may consist of 3 to 5 contractions. Many women report experiencing different types of orgasms, including clitoral, vaginal, and a combination of the two. According to Dr. Beverly Whipple, co-author of Other discoveries about the G-spot and human sexuality, the reason may simply be that different parts of the vagina were stimulated more than others, so more tension was released. Muscles in other parts of your body can also contract involuntarily, causing you to clench your toes or look goofy. As for the brain, a recent small-scale study conducted at the University of Groningen in the Netherlands found that areas associated with fear and emotion are not actually activated during orgasm (though if you fake it, it’s not) ).
Related: How to keep yourself busy tonight? Decide with Women’s Health’s sex position tool!
After the peak of pleasure, the body is usually in a satisfied and relaxed state, but this is not always the case. “Just like men, women can experience pelvic heaviness and pain when they don’t have an orgasm,” says Dr. Ian Kerner, a certified sex therapist and author of The Orgasm Rule. She’s Number One: The Thoughtful Man’s Guide to Pleasing His Woman. In fact, Dr. Kerner says, “Many women complain that one orgasm is not enough to relieve the built-up sexual tension,” which leaves us with “blue balls.” states that it is possible. please do not worry. Like the male version, it is harmless.
big “o” blocker
So what happens at night when the fuse is lit but the bomb doesn’t explode? “Nine times out of 10, that’s the reason. [the woman isn’t] Dr. Kerner says, “You need enough sustained stimulation of the clitoris.Often women are approaching orgasm and their partner senses it. [then he either] Either reach orgasm quickly or change what you were doing. ”
That’s why Dr. Kerner often recommends the cowgirl position. Controlling the angle and speed of your thrusts (try moving back and forth so your clitoris rubs against your partner’s abdomen) allows for the most consistent clitoral stimulation. Another solution is to find a position that mimics the way you masturbate. If you lie face down and have sex with yourself by pushing your hand down and rubbing your clitoris, there is a possibility that a man will penetrate you from behind in that position. By observing you, he will also better understand the stimulation you need.
“Watching” is another issue that stumbles women. “It’s when a woman is so concerned about her appearance and performance that she can’t actually enjoy herself,” says Dr. Kerner. You won’t have an orgasm if you’re worrying about your cellulite or stressing about whether your latest move he saw on late-night cable TV feels good to him. Instead, you need to register erotic sensations in your mind. concentration. I breathe. Let go. “It may seem counterintuitive, but you need to relax to build sexual tension,” he says.
Perhaps the best preparation for a big orgasm is a long, hot, humid shower, a full body massage by a man, or, if possible, 10 minutes of steady oral sex. It’s not the body that needs R&R, it’s the mind. “Many women need a transition period between dealing with the stresses of everyday life and their sexual feelings,” Dr. Kerner says. “A few minutes of foreplay is usually not enough.” Clear your mind of to-do lists, work issues, family issues, and anything else that may be distracting you from connecting with your body. Doing something ritualistic and calming is essential to feeling ecstatic.
hormones worth getting excited about
The most fascinating orgasm side effect occurs in the brain. At key moments, the hypothalamus releases extra oxytocin into your system. Nicknamed the “cuddle hormone,” oxytocin is correlated with the urge to bond, show affection, and protect (new moms are addicted to it). These findings give evolutionary biologists new hope, as increased oxytocin has been shown to strengthen the uterine contractions that transport sperm to eggs. Dr. Lloyd said it appears that the extra oxytocin may be enough to stimulate contractions and that orgasm may be involved in conception after all. “Of all the avenues of orgasm research, I think the oxytocin path is the most promising,” she says. It’s even been hypothesized that the release of oxytocin during orgasm is a subconscious way for women to acknowledge their partners as potential fathers.
The latest news is that this cuddle hormone may also be related to our ability to trust. In a recent study conducted at the University of Zurich, scientists asked 178 male university students to play an investment game with a partner they had never met. Half of the students used oxytocin nasal spray (not yet available in the United States) beforehand. Half received a placebo. Those using sprays containing oxytocin were more than twice as likely to feel comfortable giving all their money to an anonymous (but legal) partner. If oxytocin helps women feel more at ease with their release and strengthens orgasmic contractions, we might want to keep a bottle of oxytocin hidden in our bedside drawers right away.
Nicole Belland is a freelance journalist living in New York.
