||| As Paradigms Shift by Rosie Kuhn |||
People come to me for coaching when they are ready to level up in their lives. They may not know what it means. They just know that what they’re doing isn’t working. That doesn’t mean they’re in crisis. It means they want to look at themselves, their lives, and their relationships differently and experience themselves as more authentic and sacred expressions of themselves. There may be.
Rhonda has been on a path of self-exploration for over 30 years. Although she has been dedicated to her success as an actor and writer, she has always found herself unable to live up to her own expectations. Through our conversations, she, like all of my clients, reveals exquisite elegance in the way they live their lives that they were unaware of.
Rhonda is one of those people who is amazingly on point with so much of what she says. Often it’s a shocking moment of brilliance. I never saw it coming.
The other day, she said something meaningful. Although she has been in the spiritual community for decades, she says, “Spirituality is a consolation prize. I can’t succeed, so I have to compromise with spirituality.” Oh!
I find this to be true for so many people. That was certainly true for me. We ignore our relationship with our spiritual selves until it seems that there are no other doors open to us. Whether the background is health, wealth, power, or love, we assume power and control over our choices, actions, and outcomes until we achieve the success we think we should have.only
Can we then reach out to a higher power beyond our abilities to make things happen the way we believe?
A woman I know who worked in a hospice told me that most of the people she spent her last moments with on earth made the most spiritual progress during their last weeks on earth.
Where else can they turn when they have nowhere else to go?
Psychiatrist Dr. David Hawkins struggled with extreme addiction. When he was dying, he held out his hand and said something like, “God, if you exist, make yourself known.” His books are some of my go-to books for understanding spirituality and spiritual concepts. I’m just saying.’
Why do most of us reach for spirituality after first trying everything else? Even those who are part of a religious community struggle with who and what they are. Very few people know what spirituality or spirituality is. The reason I write so much about this is to help you make sense of it all. Because most of what we are fed about spirituality and spirituality is not actually true. And I not only want to know myself as a spiritual being, but I want to know what it actually means to be spiritual.
Here’s an example of what I mean about this. Rhonda felt angry and disappointed during her recent sessions. Having to accept spirituality as her consolation prize, she did everything in her power to become spiritual. “Look at how hard I work! I spiritualize all the crap! I’m doing everything I’m supposed to do spiritually and nothing’s changed! Oh my! No one is as dedicated as I am! No one works and the MFs are doing it well. Me? I’m still less than a squat!
Rhonda’s incredible rampage expressed the feelings of many people. Spiritually speaking, there is a belief that if you do the right thing, you can succeed, whatever that means. And when we don’t get what we expected by “being spiritual,” we become angry, resentful, and bitter.
What do you mean, Rosie?
What I want to say is this. Most of us talk about being a spiritual being with a human experience, but we rarely develop a relationship or engage with this spiritual being – us. We ignore, avoid, and distract from this aspect of ourselves. Without it, we would not be able to exist in human form. How insane is that?
The truth is, most of us did not grow up in an environment that supported us in knowing and experiencing ourselves as spiritual beings. Growing up in religion, we had a structure of beliefs, but those beliefs rarely nourished and nurtured our souls.
We are so lacking in knowledge about these experiences and this upbringing that we deny their importance and existence. Until, like Rhonda, David, I, and countless others, we had to start looking somewhere else.
And while many people practice spiritually for a specific reason, it is rarely to nurture and nourish their own Spirit Self. Again, without this spiritual body, you would not be able to exist in this human form.
Spirituality to me is about cultivating a healthy relationship with your spiritual self. It doesn’t have to be anything else. I want to cultivate a healthy relationship with my Spirit Self in order to reach my full potential. I don’t know about you, but I believe that each of us has great potential that can never be expressed in the world because we ignore the soul.
Knowing the current state of most people’s spiritual selves as depleted, malnourished, ignored, shamed, hated, and abused, my job is to help people through their daily experiences. It is to support and empower you to begin to recognize your spiritual self. They are in a crisis with nowhere else to turn.
Starting a new relationship with someone or something can be daunting. I can confirm that too. And exploring the possibility of building a relationship with your spiritual self can be more daunting than anything else. I can attest to that too. But experiencing the divine expression of the true essence of your spiritual self is the most amazing experience of all. I too testify to this.
I’m sure all of you have had similar experiences. There are probably many. But perhaps by making this a more focused intention, we can transform this process from a consolation prize to the most exquisite expression of fulfillment known. I am participating in the experiment myself! Why not?
