Porn is a part of everyday life for hundreds of millions of people around the world, but sometimes it can feel a bit too much.
If this is you, then our experts on this subject will provide you with sage advice on how you can best deal with this issue.
First of all, exploring your sexual side is a totally natural thing that most adults do, and for many of us, a big part of this is spending our free time checking out the latest adult videos on new platforms like Pornhub and OnlyFans.
Now, one doctor is offering advice on the subject, offering seven signs to look out for when it comes to porn addiction.
In an interview with LADbible, the American pleasure coach and hypnotherapist explained how to deal with porn addiction.
Based in Las Vegas, Kate Scherer helps people with all kinds of coaching, including fear, pleasure and shame.
As part of that, she said the second most common concern people come to her about is male porn addiction.
“It’s not a recognised diagnosis.”
“Pornography addiction is not a recognized diagnosis. You have to understand it first,” she told LADbible.
“A lot of the emotions that men are feeling have to do with shame about their porn addiction, not necessarily the porn they’re watching or how much they’re watching. The data supports the idea that men who feel they’re addicted to porn actually watch average amounts of porn.”
“Most of the time, what they’re experiencing is feeling and believing they have an addiction to porn, and that’s having a negative effect on them.”
Kate Shelor (Instagram/kateshelor)
Understanding a person’s porn habits
For Kate, the key to understanding someone’s porn habit is to compare it with other “compulsive behaviors”.
She says: “In many cases, this can be seen as uncontrollable compulsive behaviour. I like to talk to people about what triggers them to view porn.”
“Is it anxiety, boredom, loneliness? A lot of times that has a lot to do with anxiety and stress. And it’s a really important tool.”
“If someone comes to me and says, ‘I’m addicted to porn,’ it’s really dangerous to address that problem by restricting porn or telling them not to watch porn anymore. The reason that’s dangerous is because it’s a surface issue and it doesn’t address the problem that’s causing the behavior.”
“You’re trying to set someone up for failure with a pass-or-fail approach. When you say, ‘You have to stop pornography’… what happens when you see porn? You say, ‘I failed,’ and now you feel awful, and it triggers the same compulsive behavior.”
“I think that’s exactly what happens when a lot of people try to deal with a problem.”
People primarily watch porn on their mobile phones and computers (Getty Stock Images)
Triggers of pornography addiction and “enhancing your life”
“I talk to people about what’s going on in their lives and how they’re dealing with stress, anxiety and loneliness. What are their coping mechanisms right now? For a lot of people, it’s porn,” Kate says.
“This is about how you can enrich your life and reduce some of your addiction to pornography.
“The same thing goes for people who are scrolling on their phone all day. I think we all understand the urge to look at content on our phones.”
It’s important to know that if you think you have a porn addiction, you can seek help (Getty Stock Images)
Is it any different from being on your phone all the time?
For Kate, this issue should be treated like any other compulsive behavior, and that certainly includes her addiction to her phone.
“It’s not just about porn, but we stigmatize porn because we stigmatize sex,” she says. “How many of us are on our phones and compulsively watching online content?”
“We’re not ashamed of it because it’s a socially accepted thing. Doing it over dinner can be disruptive to relationships.”
“Develop a hobby, connect with friends. Looking for ways to enrich your life is much better than making rules that you’ll probably break, feel like a failure, and continue the cycle.”
Featured Image Credit: Instagram / @kateshelor / Getty Stock Images
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