II’m lying naked on the floor of a carriage house in Monmouthshire, Wales, and a woman I’ve just met is rubbing my bare bottom with her warm, oily feet. This is not a fever dream. Plus, it’s weird, but somehow wonderful. The woman is Alison Mann, an Ayurvedic masseuse, and she says the rub on her feet is a chabutti thermal massage that works deep into her muscles.
Mann is part of a team sent by Olivia Clarke, owner of the two-bedroom Coach House Retreat. Clark is a yoga and Buddhist meditation teacher who offers intimate, personalized retreats for up to four people. The rest of the team organizes wellness activities such as mindful mountain climbing (which is great), wild swimming, forest bathing, and healing. Shiatsu.
Olivia Clarke teaches yoga and Buddhist meditation
If you need to pause, catch your breath and regroup, but don’t need an intervention, or just want to feel spa-like, this is the place to do it. Whether you need to get some important work done or just need some rest, Clark Black will arrange it for you in the beautiful countryside between the Mountains and the Wye Valley. It feels sealed off from real life, but not so much that coming here demands your depleted reserves.
I came here to escape the to-do list that was starting to grow to the size of a terrifying dragon in my amygdala. I have no intention of ending it, so I’m here to learn how to live alongside it without becoming hysterical. The greatest luxury is that it is completely custom made. During a detailed briefing call, Clarke will find out exactly what you need and provide everything just for you. And she often says the most beautiful words in the English language. She says, “I’ll leave you alone.”
One of the bedrooms at Coach House Retreat
It’s not a special place, but the food is great. Chef extraordinaire Penny Johnston creates watercress soup and wild rice with quinoa, arugula, orange and pistachio for lunch, and chicken casserole with preserved lemon, artichokes and olives, potato and celeriac puree for dinner, Provide meals such as quality green beans.
The retreat is located in the rolling Welsh countryside, providing a tranquil setting for wellbeing programmes.
I have a daily two-hour meditation session with Clark. we keep talking. She is flexible, outspoken, and passionate about the benefits of a daily formal routine. In her words, it’s as non-negotiable as brushing her teeth or taking a shower.
I came away with a lot of insight and advice and committed to meditating for 6 minutes a day. I think this is the bare minimum, but considering he spent three days in Wales learning how to calm down, I think it’s a good start.
B&B from £215 including daily session with Olivia Clarke, thecoachhouseretreat.co.uk
