I had the opportunity to take a closer look at this belief on a wellness cruise starting in Panama City, Panama and ending in Acapulco, Mexico. Swan Hellenic, the boutique luxury small cruise line, has partnered with Chopra, led by wellness celebrity Deepak Chopra, for its first Explore and Restore Wellness Retreat itinerary. This itinerary includes daily yoga and meditation, as well as a workshop series focused on personal growth. I’m used to health-inspired activities. The small town I live in has a lot of meditation and yoga options, and a lot of stores where you can buy crystal and linen clothing. I am used to introspection and self-examination. Intrigued by this combination of cruise and personal growth, my wife and I set off together.
Yoga class on the shore during the Chopra Swan Hellenic Wellness Cruise.Photo: Carlo Arcos
On the second day, after spending less than 24 hours on board, cruise passengers shared intimate stories from their lives with strangers in the first of four workshops. Ta. These sessions were led by Jennifer Johnson, a highly skilled facilitator with over 20 years of experience, who brought ease and humor to the workshops. “I have a river of joy flowing through me for no particular reason. It’s just there and I have to be able to access it.” Later, I asked her why using humor was important to her. When she said this:
Near the end of the first workshop, when I had time to ask a final question, my hand went up before I could stop. The microphone was handed to me. I was one of three men in a room of about 25 people, and so far I had only heard the women talk. “I felt compelled to include a male voice in this,” I began. I went on to say that this is a situation I’m used to, often being the only man in a group of women trying to improve themselves. “Where are the men?” I wanted to know. And what does it mean that there are so few men, even though they are still the ones who run this world?
Holding the microphone during a personal growth workshop.Photo: Swan Hellenic/Lynn Hotgenrot
Photo: Carlo Arcos
Later, at dinner, as I enjoyed a gourmet five-course meal in the ship’s beautiful restaurant, other guests thanked me for speaking up. One of them said, “My husband is of your kind.” But where was he and others like him? I thought about this man’s lack over the next six days of his life. I thought about that while sitting on my stateroom balcony, looking out at the ocean from my deck lounge chair during my daily yoga and meditation practice.
Photo: Carlo Arcos
Of course, that wasn’t the only thing I was thinking about. After all, we were on a cruise with stops in Costa Rica, Honduras, and Mexico. We did yoga on the beach and swam in the ocean. We had a cultural experience, ate local food, and witnessed traditions passed down from generation to generation. We snorkeled with colorful fish. From the boat, we watched dolphins play, sea turtles take to the sky, and whales swim on the surface of the sea. The ship was clean, the food was top notch and plentiful, and the service was excellent and friendly. There wasn’t a moment that went by where I didn’t feel immense gratitude for where I was and what I was experiencing.
But I still wondered what it would take to get more men to attend workshops like this. In my experience, yoga classes that were mostly attended by men had names like “Yoga for Rock Climbers or Power Yoga” or “Strength Yoga.” Is it necessary to deceive them? “I think more men need to be seen,” Johnson says. “They need to feel like they’re not the only guy in the room.”
The expression is something that even I can understand. As a visible minority, I know firsthand the power of representation, the “permission” you get when you see someone who identifies with you in a space where you don’t usually see people who look like you. “It used to be that a man would go to an event that his wife would take him to,” Johnson says. “Usually the wives didn’t tell the whole story and dragged them away. Then more and more men came and they became identified. It used to be that there was only one man in the group or We used to only have two people, but now in some events it’s 25% men. That’s a big change.”
So there is hope.
Photo: Carlo Arcos
I asked Johnson what the world would be like if more men lived self-reflective lives. “I think if we all came together with compassion, we wouldn’t have so many wars and conflicts,” she says. “The greatest men are the ones who are vulnerable. They will have the best relationships. Whatever it is, you can use it as a catalyst.”
As for me, I will continue to perform. Maybe I’ll be the kind of guy someone else doesn’t feel uncomfortable being around. When I think of that man who had to force himself to stop crying, I think of how far he had to go to let go of his ridiculous ideas of what it means to be a man. Experience like this is helpful. They are steps on the journey.
Beyond the comfort, food, and luxury of the onboard spa and wellness retreat, what struck me most was the relationships that formed among the guests. When the time came to say goodbye, there were many hugs and tears between people who had bonded over their shared humanity. Seems like an unlikely combination, so I wondered if there was any special reason for offering a Chopra Wellness Retreat on a cruise.
“This is a great opportunity to connect in a different way,” Johnson says. “You’re allowing yourself to be taken care of, you’re allowing yourself to be vulnerable. There’s nothing better to do than just experience being alive.” 
